I am a Christian, and I am also a photographer. Now, I’m sure that you’re thinking, okay, nothing out of the norm here. What I didn’t mention is the fact that I also shoot boudoir photography. It’s not too often that I get asked about how I can be both. But it comes up every once in a while. So I wanted to share with you why I shoot boudoir photography, even as a Christian (or especially as a Christian), and why I believe all Christian wives or soon-to-be-wives should do a boudoir shoot.
Now, I’m not sure where I’d begin or even if laying out boudoir photography in a biblical context would make any difference. I’ll just say that the whole of scripture implicitly points Christians away from anything having to do with lust in thought, word, and deed. Any type of sensuality or nudity apart from between marriage partners shouldn’t even be “named among us”.
Furthermore, in my study and concurred opinion, sexual desire and sensuality between a man and a woman is a gift from God meant solely for marriage. Anything outside of that, according to scripture, is out of bounds. Of course, that’s all in the context of this (nudity/sensuality in photography and in general). Well, enough of that, let’s get started!
I asked a few of my clients if would it be okay for me to use some of their photos to write and illustrate this article.
What is a boudoir shoot?
Boudoir is pronounced Bu-dwah or Bu-dwar, and is technically defined as, “a woman’s bedroom or private room for dressing or resting.” So in the photography world, that involves a portrait shoot that a woman does privately for her man, usually in lingerie. Although the shoot is primarily done as a gift for her man, the women find that the shoot is very pampering and creates a space for her to feel feminine, lovely, and especially sexy. Women spend far too much time comparing themselves to other women they see on Social Media, magazines, or on TV and feeling “blah” about themselves. Especially tired Mommies who feel more like a Mom than a woman, most times.
Why should Christian couples be interested in boudoir?
God created men to be highly visual. It’s the way we’re built. I once heard a pastor refer to a man’s brain as a Rolodex, whereas men, in general, are bombarded with imagery of sexy women all the time, and no matter how committed men are to looking away to avoid lusting after the women in those images, it’s inevitable that some of those images are going to get in, and even pop up from time to time. And, whether he knows it or not, he remembers them. How great would it be if a man’s memory was chalked full of lovely images of his wife and the majority of the images popping up in his mind were images he could cherish and feel good about? I believe that boudoir photography is best used in the context of marriage. I think any man would be delighted that his wife (or wife-to-be) would think enough of him to give him a gift that takes a lot of courage and love to do.
The other point to consider is that in a healthy, Christian marriage, a woman should feel sexy, desired, and appreciated for her body even with its imperfections. Obviously, there is a lot more about her to be appreciated, but that’s a post for another day. When a woman doesn’t feel good about the way she looks, she doesn’t bring to the marriage the needed energy that can help fuel true intimacy. A boudoir shoot can give a woman that much-needed confidence. It’s so amazing what a little sexy confidence can do for a marriage.
The Who, What, When of it all…
The photos are an amazing gift to give to a Groom on the wedding night. Valentine’s Day and wedding anniversaries are other occasions when a boudoir shoot would be a very special gift.
There are a lot of amazing photographers to choose from for your shoot and you should find the one that is the best fit for you. If you find that a female photographer would make you feel more comfortable, many would happily welcome you into their studio. Or, if you’re okay with a male photographer, my style is very conservative, as far as boudoir photography goes, so if you are more on the shy side or you just want to keep things tamed, I’m the photographer for you! My images are sensual, beautiful, tasteful, and not over-the-top sexual. Although you can choose how far you want to go, nudity-wise. Most of my clients prefer to wear lingerie or to do what I call “implied nudity,” where you aren’t wearing much of anything, but all your girl bits are covered by your arms or legs or with sheets.
Will my photos end up on your website?
It’s fantastic when a woman feels comfortable sharing at least a few of her photos on my website so that other women can relate and be encouraged to do a shoot that will enrich her marriage or self-care. However, it’s completely understandable when a couple wants the boudoir photos to be for his eyes only and I respect that decision and would never share your photos without your permission.
If you are ready to schedule your shoot, or if you have any questions, please contact me! I’d love to talk about it more with you.
TO START OFF: WHAT IS AN EMPOWERMENT SESSION?
Boudoir is traditionally known as a style of photography that focuses on female sex appeal. It typically includes lingerie, a bed, and some slightly raunchy undertones. EMPOWERMENT sessions are my way of redefining the boudoir, while still keeping SOME of the aspects of the style.
So what is an empowerment session? It is an expression of your self-love. Each session is unique and tailored to who you are, and how you feel comfortable expressing your sensuality, self-love, and confidence.
I love to focus on details during these sessions. The little pieces of you that make up the full picture of who you are. I create a space for you to be authentically you; to break down the stigma and barriers around being natural and comfortable in your own body.
Empowerment sessions are a uniquely personal experience, that helps you find new ways of embracing the powerful body that carries you through life.
Learning to accept your beauty in your most natural of states, is transitional. With that said, everyone has their own preference of how they like their body to look and feel which allows them to view themselves in their best light. This is the time to have a good self-care day BEFORE your session so that your images reflect your most confident feeling self.
These are a few reminders of things you can do to prepare for your session, that you may not have thought of. Trust me, these little things will in some way be captured, and if you want them to look a certain way (for yourself) then these 13 ways you may not have thought of preparing yourself, will come in handy!
1. CLEAN AND SHAPE YOUR NAILS
Your Fingers AND your Toes!! They are both important. I love to grab close-ups of your hands connecting with the pieces of you that make you who you are. As for feet… Well, those usually aren’t the focus BUT they often make an appearance. You don’t want to have cracked nail polish and half-broken nails distracting you right from first glance!
2. CLEAN THE SOLES OF YOUR FEET
Once again, we’re on the feet topic! I know, not appealing BUT your feet will end up featured in some of your photos! Especially the ones with a focus on that peachy boottyyy! Trust me, you don’t want to have dark dusty feet from walking around barefoot! Either take a bar of soap or a baby wipe to those bad boys and let’s pretend we didn’t spend so much time talking about feet…
3. TAKE THAT HAIR TIE OFF YOUR WRIST!
Okay seriously, this is one of those little details that ALWAYS gets overlooked. Heck when I start a session, sometimes it takes me a few shots before I even notice! Hair ties are not pretty accessories, we don’t want those in all of your photos! Trust me, your wrists will be in a lot of images, so throw that thing anywhere but on your body and let’s get started.
4. DON’T WEAR RESTRICTING CLOTHING BEFORE YOUR SESSION
Trust me on this one pleasseee.. If you wear restricting clothing before your session, you WILL have lines imprinted on your body! I did a session where a girl had lines all over her booty! It took me hours to edit them out of every booty pic. Save your photographer’s life and wear loose-fitting, comfortable clothing before your boudoir or empowerment session.
5. DON’T CUT OR DYE YOUR HAIR LESS THAN 5 DAYS BEFORE YOUR SESSION
You may be thinking this is a weird one, but your hair needs time to settle after a big change! If you don’t wait, your hair will not be relaxed in it’s natural shapes or directions. And who wants to have pieces sticking up or into their face? I know when I get my front bangs cut, it takes a little while before the edges stop flipping outwards and actually lay on my face properly. As for color, you could have dye leak onto your skin around your face/neck/hands, etc. Yes, photographers can edit and manipulate images in posts, but it takes a lot of work to change things like that in every single image. And some things just simply cannot be done in photoshop. Plus most natural-based photographers (such as myself) are really not that skilled in photoshop because our goal isn’t to change things about people, but rather to capture what is true and raw.
6. STAY AWAY FROM SPRAY OR SELF-TANNER LESS THAN 7 DAYS BEFORE YOUR SESSION
I know that there are some people who like to add a little spice to their skin and that’s totally fine! It’s your body, you do you boo!! BUT just be wearing off when you do so. Plan ahead and add your color early. This will ensure a couple of things.
1. Your tan won’t rub off your surroundings.
We will be rolling around, twisting, arching, crawling, etc. If your ran runs onto the bedding, carpets, or client wardrobe, that can mean a lot of extra cleaning after your session and maybe some ruined materials.
2. Maybe you missed a spot?
Self-tanners especially, can sometimes turn out uneven or with missed spots. Leaving this time before your session to get your tan done, can ensure that you have time to fix any mistakes!
7. TOUCH UP YOUR EYEBROWS
This one is not for everyone! If you like your eyebrows natural and you don’t pluck, wax, thread, or anything else, then more power to ya babe. But if you are someone who likes to get those bad boys shaped and pampered, you will definitely want to get that done a day or so before your empowerment/boudoir photoshoot. For waxers/threaders, go at least 3-5 days before your session so that you aren’t red or puffy!
8. DRINK LOTS OF WATER THE DAY BEFORE
Honestly, we should all be drinking lots of water daily but sometimes we just get too distracted and busy with life that we don’t. But drinking water has so many benefits and can really change the way you look in your images. Drinking water before your session gives you beautiful dewy and glowing skin. It may sound counterproductive, but in reality, drinking plenty of water can help keep bloating down because it naturally flushes our systems of excess water and sodium that we might retain, helping to keep bloating down.
9. DON’T EAT OR DRINK ANYTHING WITH DYES ON THE DAY OF YOUR SESSION
This is a huge one actually. Eating foods with dyes, especially orange and red, will stain your mouth! It is really not a flattering look in your final images. Stay away from any pasta, deep-dyed candies, colored drinks without a straw, etc. as much as you can.
10. IRON YOUR OUTFIT
If you are wearing something that wrinkles really easily, iron it before your session! Wearing wrinkly outfits is really not the look. Boudoir and Empowerment sessions are meant to be seen as soft, sensual, and empowering. There is nothing soft about a million lines all over your beautiful silk slip or robe.
If you have a piece that you are dead set on wearing to your session, and it is made out of a fabric that wrinkles easily, iron it before your session. It will lay more elegantly on your body.
11. STRETCH
Make sure you stretch because babe this will feel like a workout! You will be arching your back and pushing that booty out more than you ever have before. You will also be hanging out on your tippy-toes a little bit so stretch those legs! Stretch before AND after your session. Your body will ache for a little bit, but it is that kind of ache that feels good – like that refreshing achy feel after a workout.
12. TRY USING GEL OR SPRAY DEODORANT
To avoid white pilling/buildup in your underarms try a gel or spray deodorant. Your underarms will be seen! This means that sometimes you will have your arms up, in your hair, over your head, across your body and anywhere else I think will look creative and sensual.
13. EAT SOME DAMN BREAKFAST
Not eating in the morning will NOT help make you look thinner during your session!!!! Please eat food before your session. If you don’t, you are likely to end up feeling sick and lightheaded during your session. Remember, this isn’t just laying down relaxing, you will be moving around and holding positions – basically doing yoga. Working out without food and water in your system is unhealthy and can cause some serious safety issues.
Plus, who tf doesn’t like breakfast foods? Start your day right and fill that hungry tummy!
BONUS. BRING YOUR FRICKEN BOO
Empowerment sessions are ultimately about love. So how about instead of just expressing your self-love, why don’t you try sharing the experience with your significant other and capture your beautiful, intimate, love! Steamy couple’s sessions are so personal. Your connection is important and something you will look back upon someday, wishing you had captured more of. Steamy sessions are a whole new level of empowerment. You are in your natural and comfortable state WITH your loved one. You share these intimate moments together on a daily, so why not create beautiful art out of your love?
